I recently had a friend comment to me on the relationship I have with my husband. She being a very cosmopolitan business woman making an art of balancing a career and family, didn't understand "our" family. The choice to live in traditional roles. She made mention of feminism, and how it was important to move women out of the kitchen and into more equal roles in the home and in society. She not so tastefully stated that by putting myself in the traditional role of homemaker was teaching my children the opposite and therefore disgracing the meaning of feminism and what so many fought so hard for.
At first I wanted to revert back to the old "Kendra", which would have rolled her eyes, done the head snap, and made her swallow her pretty little pumps. But the new improved version decided to educate her.
First, I felt it important to let her know that part of my BA degree was in History and Social Studies, so therefore Women's Studies was a large part of that and I knew what women went through, to break ground, so we could have choices and rights. Thanks to them I have the choice to go to work or stay home. But it is my choice. I believe in the traditional roles of women. I believe in uplifting men in the home. Being a submissive wife doesn't mean I kowtow to my husbands every wish, or that he is a dominate brute of a husband that has me running scared to do his bidding. I do it because I respect him, I love him, and because I WANT TO. I do make sure I take care of my appearance before he gets home from work. I do serve his plate at dinner. I do warm his towels. If his glass is empty I fill it. I do care for the home and children. I do try to please him. And why is that wrong? I married him. I took vows, this is the man I am to spend the rest of my life with. Why is it wrong to want to make him happy? I do not run around after him like an attached puppy waiting for a pat on the head. I know his likes, dislikes and routines, and if I can make his days or moments more pleasant, I will. I give freely, he never demands. He appreciates each detail, each gesture, each way I help provide a warm and comfortable home. I do not have to fish for compliments or thanks. He to gives freely. I find the more I work to provide him comfort, the more he wants to do for me and the family. He is the head of the household and I am his support.
It wasn't always this way. Before we had power struggles within our home. With finding a new way for myself with the Lord, our home has transformed. It is peaceful, calm, full of love and grace. So if I'm teaching my children the many ways of Godly femininity through traditional familial gender roles, IT'S OKAY. We have the right...thanks to the women of the Feminist movement. I can be the woman I want to be, and so can my daughter.
~Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God. Titus 2:3-5